9:52 AM Tue, Jan 13, 2009 | Permalink |
Parents cringe at those words - especially when your kid's sitting in a mountain of toys from the holidays. In this week's Parent to Parent, the experts at ParentMap magazine reminded us that often when children utter those familiar words, what they really want is your time and attention.
Sometimes it's a reminder to put down the cell phone and start a good conversation with your kids. But they also point out that kids today are used to relying on screen time for passive entertainment, and they need to learn to entertain themselves.
They suggest helping your children get engaged in an activity like artwork or a board game. Then step back and let them entertain themselves. Or do what my parents did: Hand them a broom and tell them to clean their room. That works wonders for cutting out the 'I'm Booooored" complaints.
The forbidden toys that I hide in the closet work well. You know, those messy ones... paint, stamps, play-dough...
It's the "I'm bored" when I'm busy trying to get something done (cook dinner, mop floors, etc.) that we have a hard time with in my house. I'd really like to see some suggestions for that!
We don't stand for the 'i'm bored" phrase in our house. Between being able to go outside and play with the dog or her neigbhood friends or the 3 game systems we have or the DS. We just don't allow that. But if my daughter does say those two words my response is "Chores". Now she has learned never to say "I'm bored".
As a parent, and now grandparent, I would leap at the opportunity if I heard those words. It means the child is growing, searching, wanting more. Not just toys, but something to stimulate their mind. What a great chance to help create a wonderful person.
I call those "work opportunitys".
"I'm bored" is a seldom used phrase in our home. We limit "screen/video" time to an hour on Saturday and Sunday. These things tend to shut down kid's imaginations and do nothing to increase their feelings of worth and self-esteem. From an early age we encouraged using one's imagination - legos, art, small plastic animals, games, etc. and we taught our two children how to do these things by sitting down with them and modeling appropriate play. At 10 and 11 they can now endlessly entertain themselves. They have daily chores and larger jobs. We do not give them money; they earn it by doing the "bigger" tasks around the house like weeding, leaf and snow removal, and dog "mess" pick up. We pay them $4/hour for a job well done. They buy their own birthday gifts for friends and other fun stuff for themselves. We feed and clothe them, and pay for vacations - they cover the rest. We believe we are raising responsible, contributing members of society who will never sit back as adults and say they are "bored" and then expect others to give them handouts. This mindset starts at a young age and comes from over-indulgence. If your children say they are bored, it might be time to check your parental behavior and see what you may be doing (or not doing) to elicit this response.